Say Something
Grace Notes: of Music and Spirit
Say Something
I SO get this song. It tells the story of my own heartbreak.
Say something I’m giving up on you
I’ll be the one if you want me to
Anywhere I would have followed you
Say something I’m giving up on you
It softly explodes with the truth about human love, and exposes a few whopper lies that lock us romantics into pain.
And I’m feeling so small
It was over my head
I know nothing at allAnd I will stumble and fall
I’m still learning love
Just starting to crawlSay something I’m giving up on you
I’m sorry that I couldn’t get to you
Anywhere I would have followed you
Say something I’m giving up on you
Everything about this music reflects the pain we feel when we are hit with the loss of love—powerless, desperate, humiliated, stripped down, raw, worthless—endlessly repeating.
And I will swallow my pride
You’re the one that I love
And I’m saying goodbye
We hope that if we can just now be clear in communicating the depths of our hearts that we can save ourselves from the loss. But if that doesn’t work, our pain has forced us to edge of the solution—unhooking from the situation—even the person, if necessary.
Say something I’m giving up on you
I’m sorry that I couldn’t get to you
Anywhere I would have followed youSay something I’m giving up on you
We may even begin to accept some responsibility.
Now for those whoppers:
“I’ll be the one if you want me to.” Oh boy—here I am bargaining to “be” something for you, “the one” at that. I wonder how much of myself I’ll have to sell off in order to do that. I wonder what I’ll expect in return for my sacrifice. See also “You’re the one that I love” below.
“Anywhere I would have followed you.” Uh oh. “Anywhere” is a little broad. Do I really want to give myself over to another human being to the extent that I would follow them ANYWHERE? I know of only one leader worthy of the trust to follow unconditionally—God and Its Servants of the Light. But I will JOIN with you and follow God anywhere—oh yes!
“I will stumble and fall, I’m still learning to love.” As if romantic or human love done “properly” is the ultimate in love. Until they are unconditional, romantic and human love aren’t really love at all. Love makes no demands, and never gives up. When it seems to, it’s really been a bargaining session about mutual distraction: If you do x, I’ll do y. If you ARE x, I will love you. If I am x, you will love me. If you will make me forget about my issues with Divine Love (my belief that I am separated from It), I will do the same for you. Let’s cover up the ache of separation from God together—here are my terms.
“You’re the one that I love.” I only love ONE person? Uh oh. That’s a lot of responsibility for them, and a precarious position for me. Yes, I’m still stumbling and falling and learning to love in relationship with other human beings. What I’m learning is how to stop withholding love from anyone for any reason. Real love is not about special, “members-only” relationships. I can still have more private relationships, but they don’t define love. And I can choose to physically leave, of course. Sometimes that’s necessary. But the love part I keep, always. Love never gives up.
Say something I’m giving up on you
Say something
I DO love this song—it’s musically and artistically brilliant, and masterfully executed! There’s a time it would have brought me to tears. (Okay, the video with Christina Aguilera did bring me to tears, which just goes to show how susceptible to appearances we earthbound souls are.) And if it had, they would have been tears that needed to be released. Not today. Today I can view the pain of longing and love lost with compassion, but the pain of my own seeming losses is no longer activated. That’s because I’ve chosen to lean on the Infinite and Eternal Source and learned to see and feel the Source of Love within me. Love no longer comes and goes in bodies and personalities. I can’t lose love because love is what I am. This is also true for you, beloved.
Say Something by A Great Big World ( http://agreatbigworld.com/info )
P.S. Love looks more like this—a happy new year!
With Love and Light,
Mira Carroll
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Healing Loss: Choose Love Now by Miradrienne Carroll
outlines spiritual principles and practices
for anyone who wants to heal, at any time,
from the context of healing grief and loss.
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Let all things be exactly as they are. Only reality is free of pain. We dedicate ourselves to truth today, and to salvation as God planned it be. We will not argue it is something else. We will not seek for it where it is not. (from A Course in Miracles Workbook Lesson 268)
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